To this day, my favorite part is “some of the hardest, most mentally demanding tasks.”

Like, fucker, you got a game over in Super Mario Odyssey, outta here with that shit. I can’t even fathom what exists in the mind of the kind of human who actually thinks Dark Souls is the most complicated task humanity has to offer. Boy, have you ever heard of bereavement counseling? Or how about child rearing? Those are just the hardest things I have facilitated, and my life is easy mode. 5 bucks says you’re not even playing tetris in “invisible mode,” which while technically impressive, is one of the closest things you’ll probably get to a taxing mental task in video gaming and is still basically useless unless you want to be the very best at loading your car up with groceries without even looking at how much space you have in your car.

I’m in awe, because I know people like this. I identified myself as “gamer” for years because that’s how I spent my time–WoW, Heroes of Might and Magic, Pokemon, Final Fantasy, you name it–but as soon as I started meeting other self-identified “gamers” it was miserable and I stopped even admitting it was a hobby. It was so much cooler to be “Brian the oboist” than “brian the gamer,” and fucking trust me when I say no one wanted to fuck Brian the oboist.