SECURITY: Excuse me.

SECURITY: Sir?

SECURITY: Excuse me, sir?

SECURITY: Sir?

SECURITY: Come here this instant!

PHOTOGRAPHER: What?

SECURITY: You have been taking pictures.

PHOTOGRAPHER: I have been taking pictures, so what?

SECURITY: You’re not supposed to be taking pictures in here.

PHOTOGRAPHER: OK, I’m sorry. I promise not to take any more.



The photographer walks off.



SECURITY: Excuse me, I haven’t finished.

SECURITY: Hello, sir?

SECURITY: Are you listening?

SECURITY: COME BACK HERE AT ONCE!



The security gives chase and grabs the photographer by the neck.



PHOTOGRAPHER: What the hell’s wrong with you, for god’s sake?! What are you touching me for?!

PHOTOGRAPHER: Let go, you’re assaulting me!

PHOTOGRAPHER: Let go of me!

PHOTOGRAPHER: LET GO OF ME!!!!



The security releases the photographer.



SECURITY: Right. Now listen to me, you ignorant person! Not only am I telling you to refrain from taking more

pictures, I want you to delete EVERY SINGLE one of your pictures you took since you entered the store,

and I want you to do it RIGHT NOW, or else I won’t let you leave.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Delete my pictures? You can’t tell someone to delete all their pictures! And now you’re being very

rude and disrespectful towards me just because I took pictures. I am certainly not going to delete

my pictures just because you ordered me to! Photography is NOT an offence.

SECURITY: You’re still disobeying everything I told you! From now on, if you attempt to leave this place without

me finishing my conversation, I will tell EVERY SINGLE member of staff within the building plus the

building owners about how much you are a fucking stupid ignorant liar! And they can waste hours and

hours of your time and even comphescate all your belongings indefinitely! And you are breaking the law

and you do not know anything about the law, including that taking pictures in public places and

refusing to delete them when you are told to is definitely a criminal offence and I can even call the

police and tell them how unacceptable your behaviour is!

PHOTOGRAPHER: And now you’re commiting an offence by being such a nasty bully who has no manners and making all

these threats towards me about calling the police! MENTAL!!!!



The photographer gets very upset and starts crying. Remember, this is in a public shopping centre going on in

front of all members of the public. It is incredibly easy for the photographer to draw attention.



Several members of the public hear him crying and rush towards him immediately.



MOP: Are you all right?

PHOTOGRAPHER (crying): I have been heavily assaulted by a security guard who’s now turning out to be a bully!



The member of public leads him away towards the exit. The security guard immediately gives chase and is speeding

very fast and is not even looking where he’s going and pushes past many members of the public and even injuring

a few of them. He is quite a distance behind them, but eventually catches up.



SECURITY: You! Step aside this instant!

MOP: He’s crying! I’m trying to help him!

SECURITY: Well he wouldn’t be crying if he was only able to follow simple instructions! GIVE’IM TO ME! NOW!



The security guard pushes the member of public aside towards a wall. The member of public grabs his phone, in

attempt to phone the building owners and the local police.



SECURITY: Sir, get off the phone!

SECURITY: Sir, are you listening to me! Off the phone! OFF THE PHONE!!!!

MOP: You are being a very nasty bullying person towards others and so I have to report it.

SECURITY: GIVE ME YOUR PHONE! GIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!



The photographer takes his chance to escape. He is still in tears about how that security guard was behaving and

can’t help phoning the police and telling other people to watch out for him. He runs and runs as fast as he can.



Back in the store, the member of public just manages to press 9 9 9 before the security snatches his phone out

of his hand and stuffs it into his pocket.



MOP: Hey, that’s my phone! Give it back! GIVE IT BACK!!!!



The police have just picked up and have started speaking.



POLICE OFFICER: Hello, can I help with anything?

SECURITY: Hi, yeah, this a security guard speaking from a shopping centre in Kingston. I’ve had a problem dealing

with two idiots who are unable to follow simple instructions from a security guard. I caught the first

one taking pictures everywhere of the lifts, escalators, stairwells and the car park. I told him time

after time after time to delete all his photos but he simply can’t listen.

POLICE OFFICER: There is nothing you can do about that I’m afraid, he has the right to take pictures no matter

where he is. You have probably misunderstood the fact that photography is not a criminal offence

unless it’s done specifically for terrorism. Where is he currently?

SECURITY: He just ran away before I had even finished speaking to him. Let me just find out quickly where he is.

MOP: Excuse me, don’t walk away with my phone! COME HERE AND GIVE IT BACK TO ME!!!



The member of public gives chase and grabs his phone back from the security guard whilst he isn’t looking.



MOP: Hi, this is a different person speaking. I have witnessed the entire incident and it was apparent that the

security guard was bullying him and doing everything he could to upset him to the extent where he started

crying. And also, this is my phone, not his, he just grabbed my phone off me without even asking my

permission!

POLICE OFFICER: OK. In that case, I definitely have to come over and have a word with him. Where are you currently?

MOP: I’m at the Bentalls shopping centre at Kingston upon Thames.

POLICE OFFICER: Thanks. I’ll be over there in a few minutes.



Eventually, the police officer shows up and walks towards the member of public.



MOP: He’s just over there.



The police walks towards him and glares at him.



POLICE OFFICER: Right, now listen up carefully. You are in very big trouble according to a member of the public,

for firstly wasting our time by calling us up when no-one had commited an offence. Secondly, you have

both physically and verbally bullied a photographer so badly that he started crying and thirdly, you

then snatched someone’s phone of them without asking, just to alert us of this incident. You owe these

people an apology for how badly you treated them and all the rude stuff you said to them, or else you

will be going to court. You understand that, don’t you?



The security guard turns towards the wall and doesn’t say a word. He knows he’s in the wrong.



POLICE OFFICER: Right, now follow me.



The police officer leads him away.



THE END